Here's a bit of speculation from conversation with a friend today. She's a bit younger than me, but is experiencing much of the same stuff I did earlier in life - I like to be with people, and I have a great time when I am. However, I am terrible at initiating any of that contact. What's worse is that without that contact, I get paranoid that friends are abandoning me. It's a very vicious degenerative loop. I've tried pretty hard lately to get better at it, and it's getting easier, but still awkward. I find it interesting that the capability to initiate social contact is definitely distinct from ability to interact with others, and I'm curious how many other people have issues initiating like I do.